Saturday, January 31, 2009

The Bush Library

The George W Bush Presidential Library is now in the planning stages and accepting donations.

The Library will include:

*         The Hurricane Katrina Room , which is still under construction.

*         The Alberto Gonzales Room, where you won't be able to remember anything.

*         The Texas Air National Guard Room, where you don't even have to show up.

*         The Walter Reed Hospital Room, where they don't let you in.

*         The Guantanamo Bay Room, where they don't let you out.

*         The Weapons of Mass Destruction Room, which no one has been able to find.

*         The National Debt Room, which is huge and has no ceiling.

*         The Tax Cut Room, with entry only to the wealthy.

*         The Iraq War Room. (After you complete your first visit, they make you to go back for a second, third, fourth, and sometimes fifth visit.)

*         The Economy Room, which is in the toilet.

*         The Dick Cheney Room, in the famous undisclosed location, complete with shotgun gallery.

*         The Environmental Conservation Room, still empty.

*         The Supreme Gift Shop, where you can buy an election.

*         The Airport Men's Room, where you can meet some of your favorite Republican Senators.

*         The Decider Room, complete with dart board, magic 8-ball, Ouija board, dice, coins, and straws.

Note: The library will feature an electron microscope to help you locate and view the President's accomplishments.

The library will also include many famous Quotes by George W. Bush:

' The vast majority of our imports come from outside the country. '

' If we don't succeed, we run the risk of failure. '

' Republicans understand the importance of bondage between a mother and
child. '

' No senior citizen should ever have to choose between prescription drugs and medicine. '

' I believe we are on an irreversible trend toward more freedom and democracy - but that could change. '

' One word sums up probably the responsibility of any Governor, and that one word is ' to be prepared ' . '

' Verbosity leads to unclear, inarticulate things. '

' I have made good judgments in the past. I have made good judgments in the future. '

' The future will be better tomorrow

' We're going to have the best educated American people in the world. '

' One of the great things about books is sometimes there are some fantastic pictures.' (during an education photo-op)

' Illegitimacy is something we should talk about in terms of not having it. '

' We are ready for any unforeseen event that may or may not occur. '

' It isn't pollution that's harming the environment. It's the impurities in our air and water that are doing it. '

' I stand by all the misstatements that I've made. '
George W. Bush to Sam Donaldson


Jack Abramoff, Co-Chair
G.W. Bush Library Board of Directors